Big Trouble from the “Little SPs”
Among the latest to leave the corrupt Church of Scientology are Jim and Meshell Little, daughter Heather Powers, and Meshell’s mother Edie Fields, all long term Scientologists who have contributed much to the Church over the years.
This is their story, as told by Meshell.
Why We Publicly Left the Church of Scientology
By Meshell Little
This is the story of Jim Little, Meshell Little (Powers), Heather Powers and grandmother, Edie Fields of St. Louis, Missouri. This is the real story of how we went from being 22-year veteran Scientologists to quietly resigning from the structure known as the Church of Scientology on June 29, 2010. This action quickly culminated with the St. Louis Org declaring us SP’s on October 21, 2010. This declare, as I will go over, consisted of generalities, complete lies, assumptions stated as facts, situations twisted up neatly to appear as one, dropped out time (fully handled 13 years ago) all mixed with one percent truth – and completely written with the intention of discrediting to make us look evil. This is the thanks we got for all our years of supporting this organization. That’s not all, though. They got my son.
On October 24, 2010, my 19-year-old son, Jeremy Powers, told me, his little sister, Heather and step-dad Jim that he could no longer have any association with us until we “came to our senses and recanted our misdeeds.” He originated that although he knew we weren’t really suppressive and he knew it wasn’t right, he was being forced to disconnect. He said he had no choice because he had argued all he could to get someone in the Church to see that “forced (ultimatum) disconnection” was wrong, especially when it came to family. He said he tried to get them to see that if he ever felt we were suppressing him, he would decide on his own to disconnect, per PTS/SP tech. It is our opinion that only the most evil and arrogant of groups would practice this type of family destruction, especially against people who only want to walk away.
Since he and I have always been close, this act of cruelty, on his part, is beyond my ability to comprehend. I’ve been the one always there for him, loving him with open arms, granting him huge beingness, and protecting him from invalidation & harm. All of us fully supported his right to decide to stay with the church when he knew we were all leaving it. Make NO MISTAKE ABOUT THIS, I easily could have turned him to our side – I just wasn’t sure it was the best decision. So we supported him and ensured he had funds on his account to move forward as he wished. (Major error on our part!)
He was totally manipulated with THREAT OF LOSS. He said if he didn’t disconnect he would lose his girlfriend, his place to live, his car, his job and he wouldn’t get his Bridge. He was told by the St. Louis Ethics officer that it was his choice, but if he chose to stay connected he would be declared. He cried when he left our house that day, but nothing like I cried, I’m sure. I don’t even know if he realizes the pain of a mother losing her child. He’s likely being indoctrinated to believe that we are all JUST THETANS and it is a “fake” mother/son relationship anyway. I say this because on occasions when Sea Org folks were trying to recruit my children, they told me, “they are thetans, not YOUR children!”
My mother, Edie Fields, was pressured to disconnect as well – even before we were declared – and she let them know that she would never ever disconnect from her daughter & granddaughter. She told them that she was disconnecting from THEIR suppressive actions.
Jim, Heather, Edie and I are coming to terms with the fact that we are now the victims of what we had defended and protected for years. My child, being manipulated with a threat of loss, has immediately and obediently started blocking me from his life, as if I don’t exist anymore. He’s changed his phone number and blocked us from his Facebook – eliminating us as his family. Eliminated. Gone. Sadly, he calls it his “personal integrity”.
Well, Church of Scientology, the gloves have come off. THE MOST DANGEROUS PLACE TO BE IS BETWEEN A MOTHER AND HER CHILD, and you have so arrogantly placed yourself right there.
Until you issued the SP Declare, full of slander and lies about me, then manipulated my son to disown us – I was willing to silently go about my way. I was willing to never talk about Scientology to Jeremy and I was willing to let him choose the religion of his choice and make his own decisions. He has that basic human right, you know! I knew that my compromise would be that I would be silent about my opinions going forward, in order to not provoke the church – but NO – that was not good enough. Do you really think I will walk away with my tail between my legs, whimpering and sad? Do you really think I will just give up my son and not say anything about it? Are you all completely void of humanity? Read below of the mayhem *cough* we caused to bring this wrath of a “church” upon us.
Jim and I had been in Scientology for 22 years. I served on staff for 5 of those years, first holding the post of HAS then being promoted to the senior executive post of Flag Banking Officer (right before it became a SO post). Pretty much my auditing level consists of Grade 0, FPRD basic and 1D list, and lots security checking! On top of that, I’ve had a lot of admin training, including a few mini hats, OEC Vol 0, FP Member Full Hat and M9 word clearing the entire finance series. As an FBO, during the big IRS tax exemption, I implemented the entire Treasury/INCOMM program after the IRS awarded the tax exemption. Jim has been mainly public, finishing his STCC, Student Hat, TR’s/Objectives, volunteer activities with CCHR & other 4th D campaigns. He had a few brief times on staff in the 90’s and recently in 2008. My mom Edie (now 70 years old) had been on staff for 10 years, and buying her auditing at staff rates. She is a trained auditor, word clearer and a beautiful being. Our daughter, Heather, started volunteering 20 hours a week at age 13 and had been on staff since, finally working over 50 hrs a week while trying to get through schooling, toward the end.
Over the past few years we’ve had points of disagreements and things that just didn’t make sense. Including, but not limited to, direct policy violations and circumstances that just didn’t make sense. I personally have written a lot of extensive KR’s outlining such violations over the years. We’ve commonly just dubbed in what we thought “must” be the case and settled with the “thought-stopper” that it must just be our own MUs.
The following things are only a few things that we have tried to make sense of, when actually they literally don’t make any sense at all. Some of them we consider to be just out right suppressive and against the stated purpose of the CoS. These questions are never answered in a way that resolves the question.
1. If it’s absolutely vital that we get 10,000 people auditing on OTVII – then why is the pricing of Scientology out of reach for the majority of the population?
2. In the early 70’s the cost of ALL the OT levels (if purchased in a package) was $2,500 – today it’s close to $500,000 when all is said and done. What level of inflation is that?
3. In answer to the “pricing” questions, we’ve been told it’s because Scientology is for “the able” – however, we don’t think one can judge ability by someone’s bank account. Some of the biggest SPs on the planet are very wealthy.
4. In the inner circle, org staff are considered some of the most able on the planet – yet, if they are no longer on staff and don’t make enough to quickly pay for their Bridge, does that mean they are no longer the “able” we want up at the top of the Bridge??
5. We heard from personal friends that in the 70’s orgs (and missions) were bursting at the seams. LRH went off the lines, odd things started happening and the orgs started shrinking. Reports went to LRH that David Mayo was an SP – he was declared and gotten off the lines. At that point, orgs should have had huge expansion and grown even bigger; however they did not stably grow. Really? Well, have you ever seen an org bursting at the seams since 1982?
6. Just 3-4 years after LRH died, and with David Miscavige fully in control, orgs have continued to shrink over the long term. We are told Scientology is expanding. Are we to honestly believe that St. Louis org is the only one that has NOT grown in 20 years? I mean stably grown. I’m not talking about the staff count hitting 50, because you turn around and it’s down again. The overall stats at STL are NOT on an uptrend over the past 20 years AT ALL. In fact, stats have been emergency since the 70’s, with some stats, like GI actually in Danger and Non-E. This is denied. However, there is nobody who can prove that the stats are expanding. But let’s don’t forget, we have eyes and we have observation AND we have been around for 22 years!
7. We find it most disturbing that “Scientology has the ONLY workable admin tech on the planet” yet it isn’t working to expand Scientology at the org level. Want more proof? Why is everyone donating every penny, nickel and dime to Ideal Orgs? Why can’t the expanding org, that is delivering more and more auditing and training over that last 22 years afford to just expand up to a larger and nicer location? Why does the org have to resort to “fundraising” all the while the staff is paid far below the poverty level?
8. It’s completely suppressive that staff, considered by most to be the hardest working people on the planet and doing the most important thing for mankind – are paid next to nothing. Pay in Class V orgs is so low that it’s impossible to recruit a large staff of competent people (and keep them) because you’re asking them to come on board below the poverty level. A new recruit who doesn’t have someone else who supports them, won’t even be able to afford to buy groceries, and this hasn’t changed in 20 years. If this is the most important activity on the planet – does this make sense to you? It seems to us that LRH never intended it to be this way. He says flourish and prosper, survive in abundance!
9. Very young adults (teenagers) seem to fit the bill well. These children are expected to be “instant adults” and are called “thetans” when in fact, it’s not likely they remember the wisdom of their very last life, and most lack the true wisdom of adults. These young adults have a hard time controlling their own determinism, lacking KRC with life. However, they are easy to indoctrinate into a way of thinking they should do what they do “for the cause” for free, and even if it costs them money to be there. Having a education is secondary to the org’s purpose, and they end up raised as a staff member with little outside world experience. We find this to be an oddly weird. These children are “playing office” while they are getting “trained up” and robotically wielding lightning bolts over all pubic. Dangerous combination!
10. The Sea Org cherry picks local org staff! When they recruit from staff, they claim to “replace” them with new recruits. However, a lot of times the replacements are not viable replacements. If this game is so important and the orgs are so vital, why is it okay for them to cherry pick staff from lower orgs, leaving orgs struggling to always to get hatted up again. We find this suppressive.
11. It’s also completely suppressive to recruit teenagers (heck anyone for that matter) into the SO and then deem them no longer qualified to be on staff, anywhere – if they end up leaving, even if they wanted to join staff at a class V org! Completely suppressive and we are horribly reasonable to not see it.
12. In the Sea Org if you get pregnant, you are off loaded and given your Freeloader Bill, or you always have the abortion option! Back in the days LRH was around, if an SO member got pregnant they would be sent out to work at a Class V org until their children turned six. Now, they are simply off loaded, given a free loaders bill and told they are not allowed to ever work in any orgs. More resources, to clear the planet, down the drain. Suppressive!
13. Flag coming to Class V orgs and regging org public to go to Flag to get their Grades, training and do Basics in addition to the Flag only things…they say they have perfect auditors and perfectly applied tech…making it feel like we are getting seconds and probably a lot of errors at an org. Even with the GAT.
14. We were told “LRH didn’t write the “Disconnection Canceled” policy, but that probably “some suppressive did it and just put Ron’s name on it.” Well isn’t that comforting? How do we know which PLs were indeed truly authored by LRH? Isn’t it only hearsay at this stage of the game? That PL was written back in 1968. How can anyone be so arrogantly certain that the “reinstatement of the disconnection policy” 15 years later, was really authored by LRH? Think about this statement! When LRH cancelled it in the 60’s he said we had no need for disconnection “because we now have the technology to handle every case.” Ask yourself, does that mean that 15 years later the tech didn’t work anymore, so we needed disconnection again?
15. We were told in the briefing by David Miscavige that LRH decided to drop his body so he could continue his research on upper levels without the hindrance of his body. We were told he was of sound mind and the body was in good health and he was causatively doing this. Yet, after all these years, and after all the lectures, he causatively decided to drop his body without so much as a single personal word to his “following”! That one baffles us. Think about this.
We have experienced pretty horrible situations personally and outpoints so big that they just couldn’t be reconciled. Heather’s experience when she joined the Sea Org and came back to staff was nothing short of sickening! The amount of accumulated bypassed charge I had was incredible. The number of blatant policy violations that adversely affected our family directly through the years are gross and too numerous to go into at this time. Maybe we should write a book as well!
The door to our exit was opened when we watched the CNN’s Anderson Cooper’s show, called “Scientology: A History of Violence”. As unbelievable as this accusation sounded, we actually watched it because our own church spokesperson and others from our church were also on the show. We wanted to see what in the world “we” were being accused of this time, and see how the church defended it.
On the show, we saw fairly recent, very high ranking veteran Ex-International Management members, like ex-CO OSA INT on staff for 25 yrs, Inspector General for Ethics (at the highest level of management for decades), and others of equal magnitude who were accusing David Miscavige of unthinkable crimes! It outlined how the church is ripping families to pieces – unjustly – using our disconnection policy to silence true criticisms. Truthfully, we were leaning toward this being preposterous until we heard our own church’s attorney and our current church spokesperson, Tommy Davis; completely & utterly lie about our church policy regarding disconnection. He and the attorney very believably lied, saying the church has no policy of enforcing disconnection. To say the least, we were stunned to hear this lie and felt additionally that we had just witnessed too much credibility to completely ignore it.
Paul Haggis, a very prominent 35-yr Scientologist (film producer) sent a letter to CNN saying “If they lie about this, what else are they lying about?” That is exactly how we felt. Especially having experience years of many things that just didn’t make sense and ourselves making excuses for too many outnesses.
This started my husband and I on an exhaustive research of the people who were on the show telling their stories. To our surprise, we discovered that these people were whistleblowers! We were not hearing natter, 3rd party or crazy criticism – we were discovering very well written KRs, video interviews, open letters and each discovery opened another “ah ha” moment for us. Now things were making sense! My bypassed charge was decreasing.
Interestingly enough, each and every one of these whistleblowers were subsequently declared. Some were declared for wanting to leave, but most were declared for speaking out against blatant and destructive violations of LRH tech and policy that was NOT BEING HANDLED in decades within the church.
The question we had to ask is why. Why would literally SO MANY dedicated high-level Scientologists of 20, 30 & 40+ years just decide to leave and start speaking out against the church? Are we to really believe that after all these decades of training and processing – or being trusted in the most elite management positions in our church – that they suddenly turned into “suppressive persons” and now want to destroy Scientology? We needed to know WHY they left and what they are whistle-blowing about.
So, for months we researched and with each new thing, turned up something else. Piece by piece our bypassed charge started clearing out. The mass was moving away as things started to make sense now. And to think so many times we thought these mistakes, outpoints and sometimes outright evil dramatizations were mostly because of young inexperienced and often unhatted staff that were running the show these days! Guess what, not only were we wrong in this assumption, we were being reasonable! Out KSW1.
It very soon became very clear WHY the church considers you out-ethics for reading or watching anything dubbed as “anti” Scientology on the internet. Funny, all of us are told that there is danger in running into upper-level confidential OT data that could be dangerous and possibly even fatal to us if we read it – while we’re sure that it’s out there, we never ran into ANY of it in our research. We ran into worse. Much worse! To our horror and without a doubt, we found out that the current church’s own crimes are being exposed by high profile, highly respected veteran international management people, as well as an extraordinary amount of OTs. Many very upstat Scientologists who have donated 100’s of thousands of dollars to Ideal Orgs and the IAS. They’ve walked away and are blowing the whistle. These are people who dedicated their entire LIVES to Scientology and have ended up being labeled as “raving SPs” that the church has to vehemently destroy, with horrible lies and character assassinations.
Further, we have found that people who are discovering this information and talking about it or having doubts about continuing to support and condone the church, are being declared as suppressive persons almost immediately – if the church can’t get them “handled”. We found that the SP Declare was not really being issued as a final ethics gradient, but was being immediately issued as a way to silence the person and to ensure that other Scientologists were forbidden to communicate with them.
Then to just be sure, the SP Declares were written in such a way as to ensure that other scientologist’s viewpoint of them would be slanted and the person’s credibility would be completely discredited. We found proof that in some instances the church utilized confidential confessional information, dropping out time and date of the happenings, to destroy their image. Let me ask you this. Thinking back over every single sec check you’ve ever done, include all your O/W write-ups (leaving out ALL justifiers or so called reasons you committed the OW), and ask yourself, how would it sound if it were taken completely out of context, time and place dropped out and no mention of any ethics handlings having been completed and then put in an issue for all to read? Do you think it would make you look bad?
In our search, we read the stories of hundreds of people. We watched their videos, read what they AND the church had to say in the expose “The Truth Rundown” (published by the St. Petersburg Times) which contained very interesting historical information and facts, as well as fair coverage of what the church’s side is to the whole thing. There were a lot of video interviews of ex-CMOI and WDC upper-management-type people. These interviews stunned us and we had no doubt these people were NOT lying. We read doubt formulas of Veteran New OTVIIIs and highly detailed KRs written by extremely upstat and high level Scientologists. We had the opportunity to evaluate the data against things we’d already experienced and knew to be true.
We discovered there is a huge movement of prominent Scientologists around the world who are demanding that “we” wake up! Most of these people have been walking away since 2004 and they are NOT trying to harm Scientology, these folks are applying KSW1. These Scientologists have come to sadly realize that there is no longer a way for this situation to be handled from within the church and withdrawing one’s support is the answer, per LRH as he describes in The Way To Happiness. He tells you how to handle a suppressive government, he says just simply withdraw your support.
After literally months of exhaustive research, we concluded that it is our reality that the Church is condoning the lying, abuse of policy and tech and covering it up. Ultimately, we could not, in good conscience, ignore the voices of our fellow Scientologists, including, but limited to, Marty Rathbun, Geir Isene, Jenny Miscavige, Ronnie Miscavige, Jason Beghe, Mike Rinder, Amy Scobee, Jeff Hawkins, Mary-Jo Leavitt, Lisa Hamilton, Larry Anderson (the narrator of the Orientation Film), Tom De Vocht, Sherry Katz, Christie Colbran, Paul Haggis, Mark Hamilton, Karen De La Carriere (who by the way, is the ex-wife of the President of the Church of Scientology), and numerous others.
We made our decision – we could no longer condone or support the Church of Scientology as it’s currently managed. Courageously, we, as a family, issued a 14-page letter of resignation to the ethics department of our local org, privately announcing our intention to withdraw our support. You can read our Letter of Resignation here – http://littledoubt.wordpress.com/2010/10/29/jim-meshell-little-open-letter
This blog site was put together composing much of the stuff we researched – just in case one true friend of 22 years respected us enough to realize we had not dropped off the deep end. Just in case they wanted to look. Guess what, not one single person approached us. Yes, sorry – one did. However, we were unwilling to tell this person because he was the son of our very best friends and we felt he was not stable enough to have this information. Compassion, I call it.
We realized we likely would be quickly labeled as SP’s like all others who stood up before us, however, we are not going to be controlled by “fear” of our own Church either. Labels don’t make one “suppressive”, it only stops others from communicating.
We stood up because it was the only thing that could be done. LRH describes the price of freedom. We know that once a few have the courage to stand up, then more will have the courage to stand up. Staff and management will not be able to ignore us for long, because it’s going to become too obvious that we are not ALL suppressives.
For us, so much by-passed charge is gone! Years of things that have never made sense to us, now make sense! Being labeled as an SP by the current management is meaningless – as we have already lost LRH’s Scientology to criminal and corrupt activities.
Then the day came that the church played GOD. The almighty SP DECLARE was issued on our family. I have it linked here: Little Declare, along with my comments on it, however, I need to say something here.
Here are points you need to know:
1. Jim, Heather and I went to the org and privately gave our resignation to the correct terminals in the org. This was not done “publicly”.
2. The HES was mad, said he was going to be the one to declare us.
3. We all walked away that day and the ONLY one to say or do anything else in the light of “public” was Jim. He was mad and when we got home he decided to post on Facebook what we had done, what Matt said and offered if anyone wanted to read our write up. I disagreed with this. He did it, not Heather and not me. Jim was very upset a few times and blurted things out publicly, Heather I and stayed politely private about our feelings and thoughts.
4. Heather silently came home, deleted all Scientology friends and moved on to her next chapter in life, never talking about it again – she didn’t read any sites EVER and she just moved on. She, in fact, had not committed a single suppressive act.
5. We did not get a comm ev. We did not get a Non Enturb Order. We did not get a hearing. We were not asked clarifying questions as to activities, time place form or event. In fact, we were not even spoken to again after that day, except by the DSA who was showing me LRH policy to refute my stance. I knew she cared deeply and hated our decision to do this. However, what she was showing couldn’t answer our concerns or handle the tons of atrocities that our family had experienced over the years that KRs never resolved.
With all this mentioned, please see our goldenrod, almighty God, declaration of independence!